5 Things to Take Away from the Oscars

The Oscars are a big deal to many a folk in the movie and fashion bizzes... but to me it sorta seems like a four hour wait for validation of your movie taste. The beauty of a four hour telecast is that there are inevitably highlights; four hours of Celebrity Apprentice 2 would eventually yield a golden nugget or two... its like the whole monkeys writing Shakespeare thing. Anyway, here are five things that left an impression on me last night.

1) I fell in love. Now my friends will verify that I echo this sentiment about once a week, but I think I mean it this time (not like last week at trivia, or two weeks before that at the Bruce Cover Band). Ryan Seacrest introduced me to Meryl Streep's stunning daughter, Louisa, on the red carpet last night. Sure Wikipedia says she was born in 1991 but love doesn't know math (that holds up in court right?). This is a girl right in my wheelhouse too (brunette girl next door, except her door is to a mansion and a meal ticket). Our relationship went past the red carpet as Louisa had a front row seat next to mommy, meaning lots of camera time all night. In 10 years I won't remember what Meryl was nominated for or if she won, but I will definitely remember her best supporting role.

(Honorable mentions of the night: Natalie Portman looked quit-everything-and-marry-me hot, Marisa Tomei was a knockout, Freida Pinto can do no wrong, and Taraji P. Henson was classically beautiful.)

2) The best presenters of the night were Natalie Portman and Ben Stiller. Natalie brought the aforementioned visuals and Ben took care of the laughs. Last night Stiller brought his Joaquin Phoenix out to play, but he has an arsenal of other impressions and comedic tools too. Couldn't Stiller go on for hours? If Billy Crystal (automatic first seed) doesn't want back in as host, Stiller HAS to be at the top of the short list of desired hosts (my list also has Neil Patrick Harris, Ellen, Tina Fey, and Will Ferrell).

3) The new way they presented the awards for the four acting categories was a homerun. The whole "just being nominated is a honor" thing we get every year has finally been validated. Just getting nominated isn't really an honor, but getting verbally felayshed by an expert certainly is. Losing to Kate Winslet probably would have been a bitter moment for Jolie, Streep and company if they hadn't been showered in praise by former winners. I don't know or care who wrote the plaudits but they were sincere, meaningful, and awards in themselves (that is unless Alan Arkin calls you Seymour Philip Hoffman, nice prep work ass). Maybe its not a tangible award but you're definitely going home with a souvenir.

4) Hugh Jackman's musical number with Beyonce has showed up on many worst of lists, but I thought it was a fun moment. The Academy put together montages for the romances and comedies of the year, so why not honor musicals too? I doubt Jackman's grand proclamation "The musical is back!" but I enjoyed the rest. I guess this is my public admission that I kinda, sorta, maybe like musicals (I even saw Mamma Mia in the theaters, but it was on a date... and yes, with a girl) not that there's anything wrong with that.

5) And speaking of "not that there's anything wrong with that," I think the lasting memory of the night, besides Louisa Streep of course, was the political statements and validation delivered with the wins of Milk. Best Actor Sean Penn and best original screenwriter Dusin Lance Black delivered proud, rousing speeches about the inequalities we still face in two drastically different tones. Black called for gay people to stand up proud, that they could all share this victory, while Penn scolded California's failed Prop 8 and the populous for a lack of justice. Maybe these words will spark political action and discourse or maybe they will just be tracks to nowhere, but methinks it will be the former. Eventually Slumdog Millionaire's prestige will fade just like most other best picture winners, but Milk's legacy on Oscar night may be a watershed moment we all remember.

The Snubbiest Oscar Snub of All

Leaving the Academy to decide awards for movies is like leaving Florida to decide a presidential election. This week I heard more about snubs than about acclaim for the nominees. Bruce's them for The Wrestler missing best song is downright offensive for two songs from Slumdog? I hate that Wall-E was left off the best picture list, like for the lack of live action, since it appeared on as many 2008 Top 10 lists as any other movie. Others feel that Leo, The Dark Knight, and The Wrestler were also given the Heisman (knee up, stiff armed) unjustly.

However those are just minor parole violations in comparison to Oscar's snubbiest snub this year, the omission of Young@Heart from the best documentary category. Usually I apply to the theory you can't tell me its not one of the five best if you haven't seen the others, but here's where I'm throwing my curveball, I have already seen one of the nominees. I saw Man on Wire, and am now motived to check out a couple more to prove myself right. MoW doesn't come close enough to Y@H to even sniff its old person smell. Anyway, there is very little to dislike about: It is relatable if you have or had grandparents its enjoyable if you like music, and its inspiring if you possess a heart. Kinda minimal pre-requisites.

Quick dummies guide to Y@H: Young @ Heart is the name of a chorus of extremely senior (is that any kinder than saying super old?) citizens in Northampton Massachusetts who live to sing and sing to live. Sounds cheesy and boring, I know. Here's the twist, they sing cool songs, popular music. Things like James Brown, Coldplay, The Ramones, Bob Dylan, Jimmy Hendrix, Sonic Youth, and more. Try imagining your grandparents even knowing songs by all them. The documentary follows the chorus as they prepare new songs for an upcoming set of performances and deal with deteriorating health.

At different points, the film is funny, sweet, heartwarming, serious, and carefree. It works as a date movie better than another chick flick, its great on a lazy afternoon, and even goes well with a few friends and a few beers. The interviewer/producer may become a bit too involved and irritating but its easy to forget that with the corny old jokes from the corny old men and the not so innocent candor from the sweet old ladies. Y@H runs the gamut of emotions without becoming heavy or lengthy and by the end you almost consider visiting a grandparent (and that's saying something). And for my money, there may not be a better scene in film in 2008 than when the chorus visits the jail.

In the end, who cares about awards? Who can really name all of the past Oscar winners anyway? Those trophies probably end up in your parents attic with all of your old soccer participant trophies, right? Okay, maybe not, but if you want to do some cinematic justice, and you like movies that make you feel good, throw Young@Heart on your Netflix queue or take your first trip to Blockbuster in years and pick it up off a dusty shelf.

What to Think About Wall-E

Its 2009 and I am gonna try to write more entertainment this year; gonna try to diversify a bit. Anyway this is the time of year when movies are slurped or scrutinized because its award season. The brunt of this years slurpage is Disney and Pixar's Wall-E, which is odd because it got a mixed bag of reviews depending on who you talked to. This made it a perfect first Netflix rental of the year and a chance to throw my weight around in the war on Wall-E.

If you've heard anything about the film, you know that it starts with about 30 minutes without dialogue. This is clearly the first thing you notice about Wall-E and its a weird feeling to watch sensation to watch a movie in this day and age without the director telling you what is happening right off the bat. Anyway, this beginning dialogue drought gives you the sense that you are either watching some pretentiously grandiose bullshit sermon, OR that you are watching something much bigger than yourself, something that may be extraordinary. I think this is where the schism of opinions begin because I think if you are in the first camp, it is easy to quit on the film. However if you're in the second camp, or can talk your way into the second camp, Wall-E can have a lasting impact on you.

I quickly identified myself in the latter group and loved Wall-E in all its preachy grace. I enjoyed the romance, I devoured the messages against gluttony and dependence, and I giggled at everything from Wall-E's trinkets to the little cleaner-up robot's persistence. I wont be spoiler-ee so dont be afraid to keep reading. Its the big things and the little ones that separate Wall-E from its predecessors and peers.

Little things like the catharsis drawn from Wall-E's eyes and the Captains thirst for more definitions (Jeff Garlin nails this role, even down to the manboobs) to the Eva's domination of bubble-wrap and Wall-E dancing with the trash can. Big things too. Like the Wall-E and Eva space reunion and its chain of events following and the condescending "Stay the Course" line. It was the underlying messages meshed in with cutesy Pixar pieces. It makes you laugh, smile, and ask the important questions like "If I were an iPod, how hot would Eva be to me?"... or something maybe a bit more important regarding the future of our planet.

Toy Story, Monsters Inc., Shrek, and other Pixar gems have delivered the cute factor along with the storybook moral ending, but only Wall-E contemporizes its message and morals for a current day audience. This is definitely not a kids movie, in fact I probably wouldn't even show it to them; its a love story and a heady, enlightening societal warning as well. As a 24-year old, I'm not sure if I even grasp its entire magnitude in one viewing.